🧠 You're not missing out

Hello, my friend. I hope you had a great weekend. I’m spending some time in the Outer Banks this week working on a new book for next year, and otherwise just enjoying some peace and calm. How are you enjoying the email? Reply and let me know.

Also, just a reminder that I release new episodes of New Mindset, Who Dis every Monday and Thursday. Pop in and listen :)

Let’s get into it. Here are five mindsets to consider today.

- Case Kenny (@case.kenny)

1. It’s OK to move at your own pace

Let July be July. Let August be August. And let yourself just be even in
the uncertainty. You don’t have to fix everything. You don’t have solve
everything. And you can still find peace and grow in the wild of changing things. (Morgan Harper)

Regardless of whether it’s July or August I often find myself rushing to figure EVERYTHING out. I’m sure I’m not alone in that - we’re under tremendous internal and external pressure to have everything in life figured out right now. We’re pressured to know exactly who we are, what we want, and how to get it. Certainly that is our life’s larger mission, but I find comfort in a mantra that says: You don’t have to have it all figured out right now, you just have to figure out right now.

Make it your mission to collect moments that make sense for you right now. Right now. Recognize that you are an ever-changing human. And that’s a gift! Ask yourself: in this moment… does this person, this city, this job, this habit, or this goal, make me feel like myself? Yes? Keep going. No? Get real about what you can do to find people, places, and circumstances that make you feel most like yourself.

That is your mission. Collect moments, be honest with yourself, and keep moving forward. No pressure. Just right now.

2. What grinds your gears?

“A great way to understand yourself is to seriously reflect on everything you find irritating in others.” — @kevin2kelly

I really like this perspective. What triggers you in other people? Why? Is it because it’s just annoying and you dislike it? OR is there a deeper connection to something you haven’t resolved in yourself? For instance, I personally find people who walk slowly on sidewalks to be infuriating. I’m not usually in a rush so they have no material impact on my day, but it makes me rage. That’s my impatience and need to be in control speaking up. Their behavior is a reflection of my own issues.

What about you? Make a quick list of things that irritate or annoy you in other people? What can you learn about yourself from them?

3. Don’t take their BS personally

Why do we take what other people do or say so personally? Listen to today’s episode of New Mindset, Who Dis for two tips to help you find peace amidst other people’s imperfect actions. Here’s one idea that’s really helped me push back: we take something personally because subconsciously we agree with it.

When someone does something that hurts your feelings, makes you doubt yourself, or offends you… there’s a small part of you that’s connecting it with your own insecurity or your own self doubt. When someone gives you mixed signals… “I’m unlovable.” When someone doesn’t show you respect at work… “I’m an imposter.”

Take your power back. Listen to today’s episode of the podcast.

4. You’re not missing out

Here’s a reminder that you’re not missing out on life, love, connection, success, or possibility when you:

- refuse to let someone save you for later.

- decide you have everything you need to be happy.

- prioritize liking yourself over being liked by everyone.

- walk away from anyone who treats you like a backup plan.

- decide you’d rather be alone than lonely with someone else.

- decide how your life feels is more important than how your life looks.

5. Simplify your life

"Razors" are rules of thumb to help simplify your decisions. Here are three rules from @IAmClintMurphy that we can all use to simplify our lives:

Occam's Razor: The easiest answer is often the right answer. Don't complicate your thinking when you don't need to. If you hear a meowing sound under the sofa, it's probably the cat, not a hidden speaker playing cat sounds.

Hanlon's Razor: Don't attribute to malice what you can attribute to stupidity. If your little brother colors on your homework, it's probably not because he hates you. It's more likely he didn't know how important your homework was.

The Halo Effect: When you like one thing about someone, you start to think everything about them is good. This one can be a challenge for people who become very good in one area of life and automatically think they're great in other areas.

My name is Case. I believe in the power of perspective.

Say hi on Instagram @case.kenny

Listen to my twice-weekly podcast