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- 🧠The waiting is over...
Everything will work out because you overthink, but you also overbelieve in yourself.
PS: for the next 12 hours, you can get the e-book version of “The Opposite of Settling” for $2.99
THREE mindsets to help you reflect, rebel, and reinvent…
1. Dance under the stars already shining
Don’t wait for the stars to align, dance under the ones already shining.
That’s advice I wish I’d heard ten years ago, because I’ve spent an embarrassing amount of my life preparing to feel good instead of actually feeling good.
I always thought happiness lived slightly ahead of me. On the other side of more success, more certainty, more money, more proof that I was finally “there.” So I became excellent at anticipation. Future apartment. Future relationship. Future peace of mind.
Because I was always emotionally leaning forward, I developed this inability to fully enter my actual life while it was happening. I’d achieve something I wanted badly and immediately move the finish line. I treated life like a constant pregame. Always warming up. Always “almost there.”
But the older I get, the more I realize anticipation can become a form of avoidance. Imagined joy feels safer than real joy because fantasy hasn’t been tested by reality yet. Real life is messier. The dream relationship still argues about whose turn it is to call the plumber. Success still comes with anxiety. So we stay in preparation mode because preparation feels cleaner than presence.
The happiest moments of my life are never optimized ones. They are random dinners, loud music in the car, late-night conversations, summer walks, inside jokes, laughing too hard with people you love.
None of those moments advance your career. But they advance your life.
That’s the difference I keep coming back to: achievement and aliveness are not the same thing.
So lately I’ve been asking myself a simpler question:
“What would make today feel alive?”
Not optimized. Not productive. Alive.
» today I’m celebrating 800 episodes of the podcast!
2. Life rewards delusional optimism
Science says the more delusionally optimistic you are, the more life rewards you.
Life rewards people who stop asking “when will it happen?” and start declaring “it’s already happening.”
The Endowed Progress Effect says your brain works harder for a goal when it feels like it’s already in motion.
Optimism is not hoping the stars will align. It’s dancing under the ones already shining.
“I hope this works out” → “This is already working out”
"I want to make $10K a month" >> "$10K months are already becoming my new normal"
Language changes the level of psychological commitment to a future reality. “I hope” >> your brain treats it as optional. “It’s already happening” >> your brain shifts into completion mode.
Your brain follows the story you repeat. Tell it the one where everything works out.
3. Reminder
If you've been holding your breath since January, May is the exhale. Life is about to get good again.
Some things I’m excited about…
The Language of Optimism
If you work for an organization, company, or community group that could use some more optimism, I’d love to chat. I travel the country teaching how to create genuine optimism through language. Learn more here.
This is your sign to come to Sedona
I’d love to see you in Sedona in June at Mii amo. Mii amo is the first and only Forbes five star wellness resort in North America. It is absolutely stunning.
I'm so excited to be leading a special "Clear Path to Optimism" teaching series there June 7-11. If you're interested in learning more about coming to Mii amo, click here.
Everything will work out
Everything will work out because you are a little unhinged but that’s exactly why the right things find you.
That’s it for today. See you next time.
- Case Kenny
