🧠 Letting go of anxious thoughts, the 6th love language, and self love

Major cheat code in life: ask for the big, unreasonable thing. The universe meets you at your level of audacity.

Closed mouths don’t get fed: I try to take my own advice, so hear I go: I’ve set a goal to do at least 50 keynotes next year. I always get so many kind messages about how my in-person MANTRA sessions help you create genuine hope and optimism in your life. If you’re interested in having me do a keynote for your organization or community, check out this page and reach out. THANK YOU!

- Case Kenny

1. Why can’t you stop thinking about it?

Why can’t you stop thinking about it? About them? About the moment, the decision, the conversation, the randomness of it all?

The real reason is simple: your brain hates anything unfinished. This isn’t a flaw, it’s a feature of being human. Bluma Zeigarnik discovered this nearly a century ago when she noticed a waiter who remembered unpaid orders perfectly but forgot the paid ones. Her experiments confirmed it: we remember unfinished tasks almost twice as well as completed ones. Starting something creates cognitive tension; finishing it releases the tension. Until then, the mind keeps circling.

Life, of course, is mostly unfinished. Chapters in progress, conversations without closure, feelings that don’t fit neatly anywhere yet. The sooner you stop waiting for everything to be resolved before you let yourself breathe, the easier life becomes.

When we obsess over answers, we abandon ourselves. We quiet our intuition because it doesn’t come with guarantees. We replay, revisit, and negotiate with the past as if anticipating pain will prevent it. All it does is convince us something is wrong simply because something is unresolved.

But nothing in life is ever fully resolved. Every breakthrough you’ve had was born in a season you once labeled “unclear.”

So instead of fighting your brain, acknowledge it. Then gently redirect it: I don’t know yet, and that’s okay. You don’t need everything finished to move forward. You just need enough self-trust to live fully in the middle of things.

(listen to episode 752 for more on this topic)

2. The 6th love language…

There are so many ways to give and receive love that go beyond the five love languages we’ve come to know. Here are some ideas:

• The 6th love language is when someone does exactly what they say they’ll do.

• The 6th love language is when someone brags about how amazing you are when you're not around. 

• The 6th love language is when someone works on themselves so their baggage doesn’t become your burden.

• The 6th love language is when someone treats your wild ambitions like they’re inevitable success stories.

• The 6th love language is when someone joins in on your weirdness and takes it to an even weirder level.

• The 6th love language is when someone brings you a snack because they know you’re about to be hangry.

• The 6th love language is when someone encourages you to vent and makes you laugh about it too.

• The 6th love language is when someone is patient with your overthinking and never makes you feel like a burden.

Which of these do you like to give? Receive?

3. Look in the mirror…

Not to be dramatic, but loving yourself has made you noticeably brighter, funnier, and more irresistible.

Keep it up.

Some things I’m excited about…

Trust your gut…

When your intuition pulls you toward something you can’t explain, it’s because your future self left breadcrumbs so you’d know what to do.

Two new podcast episodes

» Why can’t you stop thinking about it? Listen to episode 754 where I talk about how to let go of anxious thinking

» This is why the breakup was necessary. Episode 753 will affirm why it needed to happen so you could be set free.

Do you feel it?

I have a feeling that be Monday, you’ll receive news that shifts everything in your favor. Do you feel it?

My name is Case. I’m passionate about the language of optimism.

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