🧠 The art of unbecoming

Hello, my friend. I spent the weekend back in Chicago - the greatest city in the world! It’s a city I spent the past 12 years in and where all of THIS (the podcast, writing, books, quotes) started. It was great to be back, but I’m still loving spending some time in Miami 🙂 I hope this week provides you with what you’re looking for - peace, clarity, closure, or whatever is on your heart.

Here are three mindsets to inspire you. Let’s go.

- Case Kenny (@case.kenny)

1. The art of unbecoming

Amidst all the things we complicate in life - taxes, relationships, our health, etc. - perhaps the most confusing one is the process of becoming ourselves. We try EVERYTHING to get it right. We try to find ourselves by emulating other people. We put more on our plate in an effort to find clarity through “trial and error.” We strive for bigger goals, better bodies, and more perspective. That’s all well-serving, but there’s something to be said about simplifying the HOW of “finding yourself.”

When Michelangelo commented on how he created the statue of David from a slab of stone, he said, “It’s simple. I just removed everything that is NOT David.”

With that comment, maybe Michelangelo was onto something bigger than just sculpture? Maybe the key to finding yourself is letting go of who you’re not? Maybe finding yourself is less about becoming yourself and more about unbecoming? Consider that as you go about your week. What is something you can let go of that will allow the clarity you’ve already found in your life to shine through? In what ways can you “unbecome” in an effort to become?

If this speaks to you, read the chapter on Mimetic Theory in my book, That’s Bold of You :)

2. Is it worth getting upset about?

What are the conversations you have with yourself like? You know… the ones behind closed doors. The WAY you talk to yourself? Are they kind and forgiving? Or are they unnecessarily mean and judgmental of yourself? I’m willing to bet it’s the latter.

Today’s podcast is about ONE question you should ask yourself to determine if the thing bothering you is worth getting upset about.

Some things are indeed worth getting upset about and fighting for in life. It’s worth fighting for your passion even though you’re angry with someone for rejecting you. It’s worth fighting for someone you love even though you’re frustrated with how you’re currently communicating. The BIG things are worth fighting for and the conversations you have with yourself about them should be tough and direct.

But the rest? The little frustrations? The things that sting and trigger you? They are not. Here’s how to know the difference.

3. Be bored

There’s power in being bored. There’s power in stillness. BUT, as a collective society we have grown so incredibly averse to sitting in stillness.

Case in point, in a well-known experiment, subjects were asked to sit quietly for 15 minutes in a room with nothing but their own thoughts. They also had the option to hit a button and give themselves an electric shock to end the time. Getting physically shocked is unpleasant, but many people preferred it to the emotional discomfort of boredom. Out of 42 participants, nearly half opted to press the button at least once, even though they had experienced the shock earlier in the study and reported they would pay money to avoid experiencing it again.

That’s pretty telling - people literally hurt themselves physically in order to avoid the mental burden of sitting still and being bored. Kinda sad, right?

This week, can you find time to do NOTHING? To just be with your thoughts? To feel what you feel? To feel the weight of your feet on the ground? To look around and feel present in your surroundings? You never know when a moment of boredom will give you the greatest gift you can get - clarity.

My name is Case. I believe in the power of perspective.

Say hi on Instagram @case.kenny

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